Jovitalk - Bon Jovi Fan Community
Home Register Members FAQ
 

The Official BONGIOVIS Thread - Vol. 2

General BJ Discussion


Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 08-07-2016, 07:49 PM
BJFan99 BJFan99 is offline
Senior Member
Dry County
  
Join Date: 11 Apr 2016
Location: Finland
Gender: male
Posts: 1,591
Default The Official BONGIOVIS Thread - Vol. 2
It's August 6, 2016 - a regular Saturday night in New Jersey. Jon and Jake are home while Dorothea is in the city looking for a new handbag.

Jon: Alright, son, what would you like to do?
Jake: I'd like to talk about a couple of things.
Jon: Okay, what's on your mind?
Jake: Dad, I'm sorry to say but you can't sing anymore.
Jon: Uhmm... what do you mean? That I can't stay on key or what?
Jake: Well, kinda...
Jon: "Kinda"? Just say it straight and don't be afraid. Be honest to your Dad.
Jake: Okay. Your voice sucks ass now. You can't sing any of the challenging stuff anymore. Have you watched your rendition of "Always" from the last year's tour? It's on YouTube.
Jon: No, I haven't. Did I sing it somewhere last year? I don't remember anything about the last year's tour, unless it's about money - how much I got it, how much I've spent of it already and so on. Let's take a look at the video. By the way, watch your words, son!

SEVEN MINUTES LATER

Jake: Well, how was it?
Jon: F**k. F**k. F**K!!!
Jake: You didn't like it, huh?
Jon: No! I thought the staff of that shitty little stadium we played at wouldn't let the audience film the show. But no! They didn't give a shit about the people pulling their phones out and watching the whole damn thing through the lens! At the time I thought I could get away with that kind of crappy performance, if only because I thought it wouldn't get released. And I thought that f***ing wedding thing was the worst video of me available. But I was wrong. SHIT!!!
Jake: Dad, what did you just say to me about watching my words? Also, you should remember it was 2015 already. YouTube did exist.
Jon: Alright, alright, alright... now, where's my fax? I gotta check out how Steph and Jesse are doing. Son, could you bring your old Dad a box of cigarettes?
Jake: Nope. You should dump the cigarettes and start working for your voice again. You've lost it completely. You can't even scream anymore.
Jon: What are you talking about? I can still scream, but a whisper is so much more powerful!
Jake: Oh, why do I feel like I've heard that thing a million times before? Show me that you can still do it, and then I'll believe you.
Jon: Okay. But first, I'll drink a glass of water.
(Jon goes to the kitchen, takes the glass from the cabinet and turns the water on. It's hot.)
Jon: OOOOOOWWWWWW! OW, OW, OW, OOOWWW!
Jake: Wow, Dad - you can still do it! That was a freaking F5! Show it again!
Jon: I can't...
Jake: Why?
Jon: Because I don't want my hand to get burnt again.
Jake: If you can still scream like that, why don't you do it live anymore?
Jon: Because I'm afraid...
Jake: What are you afraid of, Dad?
Jon: Technical problems.
Jake: Why? Your road crew is first class.
Jon: No, no, no, you don't understand. I'm afraid of birds coming on stage because of the chirping noise and shitting on me...

More coming next week!
Reply With Quote

  #2  
Old 08-07-2016, 09:02 PM
It's my faith's Avatar
It's my faith It's my faith is offline
Senior Member
Jovi Addict
  
Join Date: 09 Dec 2008
Gender: male
Posts: 457
Default
Whaaaaat?
__________________
...Hard time waking up this morning
Closed the blinds so I can see
First light came without a warning
Hit the sunrise, scared the daylight out of me...
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-07-2016, 09:23 PM
bonjovi90's Avatar
bonjovi90 bonjovi90 is offline
Senior Member
Posting everyday
  
Join Date: 07 Jun 2008
Gender: male
Posts: 7,350
Default
Quote:
Originally Posted by It's my faith View Post
My thoughts exactly!
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-07-2016, 09:27 PM
liljovi93's Avatar
liljovi93 liljovi93 is offline
Senior Member
I Don't Want To Post Forever
  
Join Date: 27 Mar 2007
Location: Liverpool
Age: 31
Gender: male
Posts: 12,349
Send a message via MSN to liljovi93
Default
That was shit.
__________________


Bon Jovi - Old Trafford - June 26th 2003
Bon Jovi - City Of Manchester Stadium - June 4th 2006
Bon Jovi - City Of Manchester Stadium - June 22nd 2008
Bon Jovi - Old Trafford Cricket Ground - June 24th 2011
Bon Jovi - City Of Manchester Stadium - June 8th 2013
Bon Jovi - Slane Castle - June 15th 2013
Bon Jovi - Hyde Park - July 5th 2013
Bon Jovi - London Palladium - October 10th 2016
Excuse me, has anyone got a bottle of orange juice?!

Not afraid of Burning Bridges, cause I know they're gonna light my way...
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-08-2016, 12:49 AM
luceknight's Avatar
luceknight luceknight is offline
Senior Member
Dry County
  
Join Date: 20 Aug 2009
Location: Brasil
Gender: female
Posts: 1,842
Default
oh we have fanfic here now?
__________________
Broken hearts can't call the cops, it's the perfect crime.


Concerts I will always keep in my mind and heart:

Iron Maiden - Recife, Brasil, March 31 2009
Bon Jovi - Morumbi Stadium, São Paulo, Brasil -October 6 2010
Iron Maiden - Recife, Brasil, April 3 2011
Paul McCartney - Recife, Brasil, April 21 and 22 2012
Iron Maiden - Fortaleza, Brasil, March 23 2016
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-08-2016, 01:40 AM
Old Joysey's Avatar
Old Joysey Old Joysey is offline
Senior Member
Posting Always
  
Join Date: 17 Nov 2014
Location: On the white boat that fluctuat nec mergitur
Gender: male
Posts: 1,991
Default
ditto.


__________________
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-08-2016, 02:09 AM
united17 united17 is offline
Senior Member
Lay your Posts on Me
  
Join Date: 07 Jun 2011
Gender: male
Posts: 608
Default
I hope this isn't your day job.
__________________
Mr Bovine Joni himself
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-08-2016, 02:45 AM
Kathleen's Avatar
Kathleen Kathleen is offline
Jovitalk Award Winner
I'll Post When I'm Dead
  
Join Date: 05 Feb 2003
Location: New Jersey
Age: 75
Gender: female
Posts: 17,260
Send a message via AIM to Kathleen Send a message via MSN to Kathleen
Default
Quote:
Originally Posted by luceknight View Post
oh we have fanfic here now?
We used to and it was awesome - about 10 years ago.
__________________

You write your truth and I'll write mine.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-08-2016, 10:07 AM
jovifan93 jovifan93 is offline
Senior Member
Dry County
  
Join Date: 19 Mar 2013
Location: Berlin, Germany
Age: 46
Gender: male
Posts: 1,628
Default
I thought it was funny...
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-08-2016, 01:05 PM
Fredrik Fredrik is offline
Senior Member
Blame it on the love of posting
  
Join Date: 29 Jul 2002
Gender: male
Posts: 1,146
Default
Hilarious!
__________________
"Though I know I won't win, I'll take this one on the chin
We'll raise a toast and I'll pretend, I got something to believe in"
Reply With Quote
Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 11:40 PM.

Bon Jovi - Dry County - Archive - Top

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11.
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.